Been a million years since i last give a post hur ? sorry , but yeah tis post is not goin to be a post abbt how well i am doin and all those stuff ...

Just wad the fuck have i done to deserve all this shit man . I dun think i derserve all this shit man . I HATE 2008 tis year , why must i have my O lvl in tis year ? why must he be enlisted in tis year ? why can't they fuckin understand wad i goin on ? why am i always the one in fault ? why am i crying over him ? why am i so affected by the things he does ? Why am i so concern over his matter ? Why can't i chose to hack care abbt stuff ? why i can't lead a life i lead last year ? why i can't i lead a fuck care attitude life ? why is he doin all these to me ? why are my they nagin more than ever ? why are they so freakin concern over wad i want to work as when i grow up , when all they want me to be are work tat i dun want to work as ? Why am i even alive ? why can't i be dead ? why can't things be less complicated ? why are the things people saying contridicting with wad another people says ?

If i shule have know , i would stop studying in sec 4 and won't have listen to my mother say: " aiya , N lvl can pass le O lvl try and see if can pass or not nor , at least u have tried . " TALK IS CHEAP !!! She told me tat , okie i listen to her . Tis year she turn ard and say : " tis year O lvl lei , u better get into a poly if not u go restudy. " WTF , she say to try if cannot make it , then nvm , at least gt try before , now come turn ard and say she nv say those. My dad is even worst * dun wish to go on abbt him , just know tat he is worst off than my mother , AND he nags like a woman * . i just dun get it , some one enlighten me . Is just a FUCKING exam , why must i sacrifice so much for it ? Even if i gt As , the Raffles girls sch would also get As , Other sch will also get As , then wad so Good abbt As , when everyone can also get it ? Wad so good to boast abt when so many people also can get it ? Why shule is even sacrifice so much just to get the things other people also can get ? for wad , nt like when u gt As , the goverment would give u a 3D4N stay in the Hilton hotel or Give u an airticket to a country with all expense paid , because u gt As. In the nutshell , what the use to sacrificing so much to get things tat people also can get ? What the Use of Studying like Shit and Not Getting the Marks You Shule be given ?

Things were Never On my side. Why are things so ? i dun noe ? Why is he doin such things? i dun noe. i'm clueless . i realli am . i hate the feeling of being clueless. i realli hope a mricle can happen. i have did what i can and still is thinkin up of things i can do so tat i can change things. I was startled when i woke up todae morning at 5 am . i was havein a nightmare. i realli hope is just a nitemare. a thing tat will not happen. i dreamt that.... * argh , can't type out the words narh * i realli hope is just dream. baby , i gave u my promiss , wad abbt u ? are u goin to keep ur promiss ? are u ? Just wahy aren't u replyin my my msgs nor calls ? just wad do u want from me ? I am realli at my wits end . I am abbt to burst le , from all those waiting and waiting. At least give me an ans or sign , so tat i noe if i am on the right path . Wad ever is it , i nt leting things go...

Nights of tears ,
Nights of waiting ,
Nights of misses ,
Nights of deep in tots ,
Nights of poundering on wad can be done,
Seems To be my Daily routine....